A Letter To The Newspaper Car Guy

I am waiting to buy a driverless car

till it lets me jump in the back seat safely

and enjoy the ride, having sex with myself.

Some days I may wish to take my wife,

but never my life, be assured of that:

we have several children and grandchildren.

Taking my wife, I would also want sex,

being in the back seat with nothing to do,

the car taking care of ourselves and the route.

So this is the level of distracted driving likely.

And what I wonder is: how long it will take

to achieve this safely in a  driverless car?

We are in our late seventies.